How do you find joy?
As imperfect human beings, we unfortunately cannot feel happy all the time. We are bound to have moments of dis-ease and displeasure. Some of us have experienced hardships and trauma from which it feels hard to bounce back. Others are currently undergoing bouts of anxiety or depressed mood. The advice is always to talk to a friend, seek professional help, or pray about it. And while all of those actions are helpful, there’s more that we can do to incorporate more joy into our everyday lives.
First, it’s important to note that joy is not something we seek out and “find.” Joy, much like happiness or confidence, is something we create intentionally. We have all the tools inside and around us to create and experience more joyful moments in our lives. The operative words here are “joyful” and “moments.” Naturally, we aren’t able to experience constant joy (although we can get pretty close), but we can take advantage of every waking moment and create the joy that we desire. We have unlimited joy at our disposal. It only requires us to be intentional and add joyful moments to our agenda. The following are three of the ways you can experience more joy.
Choose to live in the present often
We can often find ourselves wandering off to the past reminiscing on the old days and reliving painful memories, or to the future anticipating what’s to come and planning out all of our remaining days on this earth. And even though naturally we can only live in the present, we forget that we have to choose to do so. Yes, you read that right, we have to choose to come back to the present each time. It’s not automatic. To return from the pain, anticipation, and future planning, we have to choose to redirect our minds to the present moment. While in the present, we can experience joy in unlimited ways.
We can experience joy by allowing ourselves to be awestruck by nature, skipping instead of walking, singing instead of speaking, and using funny voices or impressions while reading a non-fiction book. In each moment that you find yourself “living” in the past or the future, redirect yourself to the present by using 4 or all 5 of your natural senses to get curious about what’s happening now in and around you.
Another option is to use your imagination in the present moment to create a visualization of a joyful scene. Immerse yourself in all the features of this joyful scene by noticing all the details of what you see, hear, smell, and feel around you. Imagine what things you might taste in this joyful place. There are so many themes you can come up with, and you can even change the scene each time.
Schedule “joy dates”
We use planners and calendars to schedule important dates, birthdays, travels, and special occasions. Why not joy dates too? The next time you access your calendar or planner, think about how you can add time for joy. Time for joy can be anything you enjoy doing whether active or relaxing.
Think about an activity that sparks joy for you. It can be free or come with some associated cost you would be okay with. It can be in the privacy of your own home, in nature, or at a designated location. It can be done alone or with others. No matter the case or situation, be sure to add it to your calendar like you would any other important date. Make joy a priority if you want to experience more of it.
Perhaps you might enjoy an hour of coloring in your adult coloring book, a few hours of getting lost in your favorite video game, or a couple hours of crafting. You might find enjoyment in taking a hike outdoors, riding your bicycle, touring specific landmarks, or taking a drive around a neighborhood you haven’t yet visited. Wrecking rooms, escape rooms, dance lessons, and music lessons are also options for your enjoyment. The world is your oyster!
Join in the silliness with friends or loved ones
If you find yourself scoffing at your friend or loved one whenever they are being silly, ask yourself “Why don’t I give it a try?” You might find that you enjoy being a little silly every now and then. Joining in with the silliness of others, or even creating your own silly moments, reconnects you to your inner child. Remember when you were a child and the world was an infinite space for curiosity? Well, guess what? It still is! And as adults, we are not excluded from experiencing life in this way.
What if every time your friends or loved ones do something silly is the universe’s way of encouraging you to reconnect with your inner child? Notice how often you find yourself judging or scoffing at them, and instead of walking away or ignoring them join in. Notice how joining in changes your mood or mindset. Later on, I encourage you to journal about the experience and what you learned about yourself.
For your reflection
What would it mean to be able to experience joy?
If you could visualize yourself having a joyful experience, what would it look like?
How could you cultivate more joy right now, in this present moment?
What kind of activities spark joy for you?
What silly action can you join in on?
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